12 March 2009;
Yours truely.
This post is gonna hurt.
If the reader understands what it really means.
So, just don't read it ok! (:
I just need to get a place to express it out.
You would be thinking "ahh, what the fuck, attention seeker"
Then, get out of this page and proceed on the the other links down there.Everyday is getting bored~
It wasn't fun yesterday.
Its just so wrong.
Very wrong.
The situation became very awkward.
I feel like expressing out somehow.
...
I felt violated yesterday.
You may think its ridiculous, a joke, but i don't really feel comfortable.
I struggled, verbal words: I'm in pain, would make you stop what you're doing.
But, no, you made me more uncomfortable or more painful.
Well, that toothbrush was the most ridiculous thing, ever.
Vibrating through the way it is, and mind it where you're placing.
"Hahaha", you think its funny. Yeah, hell, god damn funny.
Being looked at and joked, all laughed...
Simply no one bothered to help or anyone of them stopped.
Nobody cared. Totally helpless.
Simply great.
I pushed.
Yes, the one who's the smallest, in size, and the one who made me in pain the most.
Yeah, funny. Laugh all you might.
I'm not sure, but whether is it i vented on him.
Though i doubted so.Wasting blog space too~
I left, and simply, no i would rather use the word utterly, disappointed.
5 years, you told me how difficult that the relationship has built.
You were rather upset by how DIFFICULT it was to be.
Down there, i think, you would be the closest and the most understandable one, to me.
No. I don't think so now, i should reconsider this sentence about using "closest".
But, you didn't chase up...
Not the FIRST one who called up. I was waiting if you don't get it.
The first one in my mind is you. How importantly that i needed aid and comfort.Argh!
Nah. Fucking god damn it and hell no.Just so sorry!
And surprisingly, it was the other one.
The one who pissed me off.
I thought i was petty. And i think i should be.
Its just so not me, though.
You wanted to maintain your love.
Okay, i think its understandable.
Well, i can see how you place it no. 1.
He say "don't care him" and you followed what he told you.
"CARE"... Where is it in your heart now?
That word is just more than what it means.
Its obviously i'm hurt.
The way i'm moving, my actions...
Yeah... You might be thinking that "he might be jealous."
And this "jealous" is obvious.
Well, damn obvious enough.
Did you hide your true feelings?
Oh no.... Maybe you're not even hiding.
Now i'm doubting... :/
Yeah. Jealousy is indeed scary.
I remembered a friend told me that she's actually acting in front of her best friend!
And she actually hate her best friend who now became her so-called "best friend".
And they had been together since primary 5 till now.
How long has it been?
And her so-called "best friend", same situation here, puts love in no. 1 position.
Now, i understand how she feels.
Because, maybe someone was putting up show too!
Hmmm... i haven't, or rather couldn't even find the true ones in my life.
I didn't share a lot about myself with normal ones.
Well, the one being closer... no....
I think i'm the one who needs the change.
Maybe its me, who knows?Till here!! :D
He told me "let bygones be gone".
Yeah... Is it true that you meant what you said?
You're the ever one that quarreled with me the most.
You're the ever first one.
Even with my family, it's not more than you.
Then I thought, it is only my fault?
I'm the one who should apologize eh?
You don't apologize. Yeah.
Hell, yeah. You always don't.
I'm the one giving it into you huh.
There's no need to hide.
Just stay away like i've got virus infected.
Just speak out your feelings!
Right at my face? Nah.
Just don't need to give a fucking damn about it. :D
Barriers are forming up between, thicker than reinforced walls.
Perhaps, the one building it up is me.
Or i'm just too sensitive.
Getting over reacted huh.Bye!
asdasd
11:52 am